Blacklisted

Show notes for Season 1, Episode 1.

Or Koran 4:47 “O you who were given the Scripture, believe in what We have sent down [to Muhammad], confirming that which is with you, before We obliterate faces and turn them toward their backs or curse them as We cursed the sabbath-breakers. And ever is the decree of Allah accomplished.”

In 1 Corinthians 5:1-5 The Apostle Paul says this, “It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and of a kind that is not tolerated even among pagans, for a man has his father’s wife. And you are arrogant! Ought you not rather to mourn? Let him who has done this be removed from among you. For though absent in body, I am present in spirit; and as if present, I have already pronounced judgment on the one who did such a thing. When you are assembled in the name of the Lord Jesus and my spirit is present, with the power of our Lord Jesus, you are to deliver this man to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord. …” 

James Walpole says it like this: “Public shaming enforces outward compliance, not internal change.”

To learn more about my guest, Gene McConnell, visit his website, authenticrelationshipsint.com.

For more on Jack Dorsey eating at Chick-Fil-A, click here.

“Neuroscientists have found that social rejection is experienced much like physical pain — connected to the same neural circuitry. People who perceive that they have been rejected or excluded by a group are more likely to harm multiple persons if they become violent.”

The study finds that when we ostracize others, we suffer a similar degree of pain as the person being ostracized. While those being ostracized felt more anger, the one who did the ostracizing felt more shame, lack of connection, and especially loss of autonomy. So when we inflict pain on others, we ourselves suffer too. 

“The imposition of silence is a power play that expresses the ultimate contempt for the target: as George Bernard Shaw put it, “Silence is the most perfect expression of scorn.” The one giving the silent treatment — whether it’s not answering email, turning away in the middle of a conversation, or pretending not to hear a question — gets to feel control. In not explaining the cause, the perpetrator delivers particular pain. The message is loud and clear: “You do not matter.”

Janice Harper says it this way, “Shunning is a non-action — to shun is to avoid, not to interact.”

To quote James Walpole again, “Shaming galvanizes opposition and makes people dig deeper into their own positions (to defend their egos, of course).”